Things I've Learned About Myself Since Marriage....
1. I am a really violent sleeper. Kicking, elbowing, or otherwise acting like I'm the Unconscious Karate Kid. I'm also an unrepentant cover thief.
2. I hate loading the dishwasher, but don't mind unloading. The opposite is true for Christy. This works out well...except when one of us is out of town. Suddenly, the dishes pile up either in the sink or in the dishwasher. It's amazing how quickly you get dependent on each other.
3. I really like giving. Seriously, nothing makes my day more than performing some small gesture (or large gesture) that takes some burden off of Christy. I actually derive pleasure from this. Actually, I've found this extends beyond Christy. Try buying a homeless guy lunch sometime...it makes the stresses of an office job seem like nothing in comparison.
4. I'm not very good at time management. A funny fact for a guy who compulsively checks his watch. If I were better at it, I would probably - among other things - find more time to post stuff on this blog.
5. Maybe I AM a cat person. Christy's cat, Max, has been conducting a stealth campaign to get me to like him....a campaign sometimes interrupted by wetting and throwing up, but nevertheless effective. Never underestimate the effectiveness of sitting in someone's lap and demanding pets. I recommend this technique be used sparingly at the office.
6. I don't hate all vegetables. I have actually eaten and even enjoyed things like carrots, spinach, onions and peppers. Don't tell my parents. They wouldn't survive the shock. Christy says broccoli is next. But there's a difference between maturing in what I eat and selling my soul to the vegetable industry.
7. I am late and need to jump in the shower, get dressed, and get to work NOW!
Bye folks. Leave witty comments.
2. I hate loading the dishwasher, but don't mind unloading. The opposite is true for Christy. This works out well...except when one of us is out of town. Suddenly, the dishes pile up either in the sink or in the dishwasher. It's amazing how quickly you get dependent on each other.
3. I really like giving. Seriously, nothing makes my day more than performing some small gesture (or large gesture) that takes some burden off of Christy. I actually derive pleasure from this. Actually, I've found this extends beyond Christy. Try buying a homeless guy lunch sometime...it makes the stresses of an office job seem like nothing in comparison.
4. I'm not very good at time management. A funny fact for a guy who compulsively checks his watch. If I were better at it, I would probably - among other things - find more time to post stuff on this blog.
5. Maybe I AM a cat person. Christy's cat, Max, has been conducting a stealth campaign to get me to like him....a campaign sometimes interrupted by wetting and throwing up, but nevertheless effective. Never underestimate the effectiveness of sitting in someone's lap and demanding pets. I recommend this technique be used sparingly at the office.
6. I don't hate all vegetables. I have actually eaten and even enjoyed things like carrots, spinach, onions and peppers. Don't tell my parents. They wouldn't survive the shock. Christy says broccoli is next. But there's a difference between maturing in what I eat and selling my soul to the vegetable industry.
7. I am late and need to jump in the shower, get dressed, and get to work NOW!
Bye folks. Leave witty comments.
posted by Ben at
6:59 AM
2 Comments:
I like carrots, spinach, onions, and peppers. Broccoli sucks. No one wants to eat a tree unless they are a koala, giraffe, or similarly ridiculous animal. So, Christy is wrong.
As for time management, I would argue that those who are less adept at it would be more likely to compulsively check their watch. Those of us who have no problems never need worry what time it is.
By
Mike, at 3/22/2007 2:24 PM
If carpe diem means "seize the day" does diem carpe mean "daily seizures"?
Hey, it's kind of witty.
By
Matthew B. Novak, at 3/22/2007 8:39 PM
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