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What Would People Think?

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

A Bizarre Dream - and a Long Delayed Introduction

Man, did I ever have a weird dream last night.

I dreamt I got married to a total stranger in one of those Las Vegas Instant Wedding chapels. Not to Christy. But to a total stranger. I don't even remember why I did it in the dream, but I do remember waking up and spending a minute trying to figure out how I would explain this to Christy....before I realized that none of it had ever happened.

Another weird aspect of this dream was that I spent much of it trying to figure out how I was going to explain this wedding to my college....which in the dream was some sort of Bob Jones-esque place which might not look kindly on shotgun weddings. Not that I'm sure it was even a shotgun wedding.

I'm sure psychologists/psychiatrists (I can never remember the difference) would have a field day with this. Me, I need to go to the dentist and then come back and study Commercial Paper (read: checks and promissory notes.......sure we could just call it that, but we're lawyers and we need fancy names for everything). Then, in a few weeks, I'll get married and put this whole weird dream thing behind me. Heck, I'll put it behind me now.

But first......

Speaking of Bob Jones, I realize that I have been unforgivably remiss in introducing an occasional commenter on this blog to my other friends.

Monica Raab and her husband, Chris, stand as living reminders to me that I'm not allowed to stereotype. Both are graduates of Bob Jones University. Chris is about to enter into his 3rd year at Duke Law and has served with me in the Christian Legal Society.

Before I met the Raabs, my only impression of Bob Jones University came from the stories in 2000 that the college did not allow interracial dating. I read their justification for it - based on a truly strained interpretation of the Book of Revelations - and I was not impressed. I imagined the school as intellectual breeding grounds for young Jerry Falwells and Ralph Reeds. (Ralph Reed's political career, Rest In Peace.) I don't know if I ever really thought about what the students were like but, based on that dating policy, I suppose I had this image of a campus full of angry, hateful racists who justified it all in the name of Christ.

Then I met Chris Raab (no relation to some pop culture figure who refers to himself as "Raab Himself"). The first word that popped in my mind when I met him was "earnest." No one I've met has given such first impression of seriousness and sincerity. As I got to know him better, I discovered that while he was, in fact, capable of joking....that impression of sincerity was genuine. He was also kind, friendly and - this being the part made me surprised when I found he was a Bob Jones graduate - thoughtful. He clearly had given much thought to his faith and his views of law and politics. While he is much more conservative than me, he is also open-minded, willing to engage one in serious discussion. I've never known him to engage in the kind of sarcastic, bitter political cheap shots that poison public discourse and which, I'm ashamed to say, I've often been a part of. In a word, he's awesome.

Finally, Chris shattered my last ignorant stereotype of Bob Jones students (that they were all racists) when he told me how glad he was the Bob Jones had dumped the ban on interracial dating before he went there. His then-fiancee, now-wife is part.....Indian, I think. I don't quite remember.

I first met Monica at a lunch a couple months before she and Chris got married, just after he had proposed to her. My single-word first impression of Monica: "firecracker." I mean that in a positive way. Here was an intelligent young woman with a forceful personality who wasn't afraid to let her opinions be known. (Yet another refreshing sign that Bob Jones doesn't create stereotypes.) I'm not calling her abrasive. On the contrary, she exudes a warmth of personality, a kindness, and a seriousness about her faith that made me see why she was a perfect match for Chris. But she does have a wonderfully sharp wit and she knows her own mind. In a word, she's awesome.

I mean, she patterned her wedding dress after one of the dresses in Lord of the Rings. How cool is that?!

(By the way, I've occasionally engaged some of Monica's friends in discussion over at her blog. While they are far more conservative than me, they're no stereotypes either. Not that this adds or detracts from her awesomeness, but Monica tends to take the more liberal view of many issues than her friends.)

I deeply value Chris and Monica's friendship. And I am incredibly touched that they chose to attend my and Christy's wedding since it takes place on the exact date of their one-year wedding anniversary!

So, apologies for not e-introducing the Raabs to my friends sooner.

Oh, by the way, all you readers of my blog who have been invited to my wedding, SEND IN YOUR RSVPS! Even if you are not coming, SEND 'EM IN! Even if you assume I already know you're coming, SEND 'EM IN! I need to know, among other things, what food you are ordering.


  • Your dream means you need to buy and electric guitar and smash it on the dirt floor of a local coffeehouse.

    By Blogger Kenny, at 7/19/2006 11:22 PM  

  • Wow, you're right Kenny. It all makes perfect sense. Except the dirt floor part. Where do I find a coffee house with a dirt floor?

    And if I'm going to smash an electric guitar, I gotta do it in Seattle. Out of respect for the classics.

    By Blogger Ben, at 7/20/2006 9:04 AM  

  • Actually, Ben, the Who were smashing guitars at places that weren't Seattle (though I can't remember where) long before Seattle was even a blip on the music scene's radar. (Oh, have I mentioned I'm going to see the Who Sept. 23?)

    Besides, I disagree with Kenny. I think your dream means that you subconsciously feel the need to do something crazy before you get married, which can easily be taken care of when you're down here in a week and a half. It will not include smashing my guitar though.

    By Blogger Mike, at 7/20/2006 10:35 AM  

  • Ben, you're a dear. Thanks for the kind intro.

    We can't wait to see you and Christy get married! You're going to LOVE being married.

    By Blogger Monica, at 7/21/2006 9:34 AM  

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